Sunday 29 April 2018

‘She burns facts and uses the ash to create a perfect smoky eye’: Sarah Huckabee Sanders is left on the verge of tears after Michelle Wolf attacks press secretary during vicious Correspondents' Dinner speech that Trump skipped

  • White House Correspondents' Association dinner was held on Saturday night in Washington, DC
  • Comedian Michelle Wolf of the Daily Show lashed into President Donald Trump in her speech
  • Trump skipped the dinner for second year in a row in favor of a campaign-style rally in Michigan
  • Unlike last year, several current White House staffers attended including Sarah Huckabee Sanders

  • Comedian Michelle Wolf has roasted President Donald Trump at the White House Correspondents' dinner, and savagely attacked some of the president's top staff in attendance. 
    The second White House Correspondents' Association dinner in a row without the president was held on Saturday night at the Washington Hilton, as Trump held a campaign-style rally in Michigan.
    Wolf's routine was raunchy and controversial at times, including one joke about abortion that visibly unsettled the crowd, and uncomfortably personal attacks on White House staffers present. 
    'It's 2018 and I am a woman so you cannot shut me up. Unless you have Michael Cohen wire me $130,000,' said Wolf, referencing the Stormy Daniels controversy. 
    'You can find me on Venmo under my porn star name: Reince Priebus,' she added, receiving a thumbs up from the former White House chief-of-staff in the audience. Priebus later tweeted that the performance was 'An R/X rated spectacle that started poorly and ended up in the bottom of the canyon.'
    Wolf also addressed Trump's absence head on. 'I would drag him here myself, but it turns out that the president of the United States is the one p***y you're not allowed to grab,' said Wolf, best known from her work on the Daily Show.   
    The room grew quiet and groans were heard as Wolf directed harsh jokes at White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders, who was sitting just feet away, including attacks on her appearance.
    'I have to say I'm a little starstruck, I loved you as Aunt Lydia in A Handmaid's Tale. Mike Pence, if you haven't seen it you would love it,' said Wolf, turning to Sanders, who had been graciously thanked for her work earlier in the evening by White House Correspondents' Association President Margaret Talev. 
    Michelle Wolf cracks up White House Correspondents' Dinner
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    Groans were heard as Wolf directed harsh jokes at White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee SandersWhite House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders
    Groans were heard as Wolf directed harsh jokes at White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders, sitting feet away
    'I like Sarah, I think she's really resourceful. She burns facts and uses the ash to create a perfect smokey eye,' said Wolf
    'I like Sarah, I think she's really resourceful. She burns facts and uses the ash to create a perfect smokey eye,' said Wolf
    Sarah Huckabee Sanders attends the 2018 White House Correspondents' Dinner at Washington Hilton on Saturday night
    Sarah Huckabee Sanders attends the 2018 White House Correspondents' Dinner at Washington Hilton on Saturday night
    SandersAunt Lydia

    Wolf compared Sanders (left) to Aunt Lydia (right), a character from A Handmaid's Tale. In the show, the Aunts are a class of women assigned to indoctrinate Handmaids with the beliefs of the new society and make them accept their fates
    Former Trump aides Sean Spicer (left) and Anthony Scaramucci (right) offered harsh reviews of Wolf's performance
    'I like Sarah, I think she's really resourceful. She burns facts and uses the ash to create a perfect smokey eye,' the comedian added. 'Maybe she's born with it, maybe it's lies.'
    'I'm never really sure what to call Sarah Huckabee Sanders. Is it Sarah Sanders, is it Sarah Huckabee Sanders, is it Cousin Huckabee, is it Aunt Huckabee Sanders?' Wolf said, continuing, 'What's Uncle Tom but for white women who disappoint other white women? Ah I Know, Aunt Coulter.
    Wolf also took shots at counselor to the president Kellyanne Conway. 'Man, she has the perfect name for what she does. Conway. It's like if my last name was tells-jokes-frizzy-hair-small-tits.'
    Ivanka Trump also came under fire: 'Ivanka, she was supposed to be an advocate for women but she is about as helpful to women as an empty box of tampons.'
    Wolf also compared the president's daughter to a 'diaper genie', saying she 'Looks sleek on the outside, but inside is full of s**t.' 
    One of the evening's most shocking moments came while Wolf was attacking Vice President Mike Pence, and joked about abortion. 
    'Mike Pence is what happens when Anderson Cooper isn't gay. Mike Pence is the kind of guy who brushes his teeth and then drinks orange juice and thinks, Mmm,' said Wolf.
    'He thinks abortion is murder. Which first of all don't knock it til you try it. And when you do try it, really knock it, you gotta get that baby out of there.'
    CNN Senior White House Correspondent Jeff Zeleny did not approve
    CNN Senior White House Correspondent Jeff Zeleny and Reince Priebus both thought the performance was in bad taste
    Counselor to the president Kellyanne Conway reacts after Wolf said her last name was 'perfect' for her job
    Counselor to the president Kellyanne Conway reacts after Wolf said her last name was 'perfect' for her job
    White House Press Secretary Sarah Sanders arrives on stage at the White House Correspondents' Association dinner
    White House Press Secretary Sarah Sanders arrives on stage at the White House Correspondents' Association dinner
    A view of the venue during the 2018 White House Correspondents' Dinner at the Washington Hilton on Saturday night
    A view of the venue during the 2018 White House Correspondents' Dinner at the Washington Hilton on Saturday night
    The crowd of 3,000 included the Washington DC journalism elite rubbing shoulders with the rich and powerful at the dinner
    The crowd of 3,000 included the Washington DC journalism elite rubbing shoulders with the rich and powerful at the dinner
    Wolf said she had decided to attack Trump on the basis of his finances, saying that when it comes to racism, xenophobia, incompetence or impotence 'he's heard all of those and he doesn't care.'
    'You might be rich in Idaho but in New York you're just doing fine,' she said.
    Using call and response from the audience, she shouted 'Trump is so broke', to which the audience responded 'how broke is he?'
    Among her responses were: 'He has to fly failed business class'; 'He looked for foreign oil in Don Jr's hair'; 'Southwest used him as one of their engines'; and 'He had to borrow money from the Russians and now he's compromised.'
    Wolf promised however that she wouldn't dwell too much on jokes about Russia, since there were many members of the 'liberal media' present. 'I wouldn't want to see what you look like when you orgasm,' she noted. 
    Wolf is just the fifth woman to host the annual dinner since the tradition of having comedians perform began in 1983. 
    Before Wolf delivered the keynote she said she wished Trump had come to the event.
    'I like making fun of people to their face ... more than behind their backs, so it would have been more fun' if Trump were in the audience, Wolf told CBS' 'This Morning Saturday.'
    'None of my jokes changed. It's just nicer to make fun of them when they're there. I think it's cowardly not to go.'
    Before Wolf spoke, House Sepaker Paul Ryan performed in a video skit about seeking a new job after he retires from Congress at the end of his term. It was poorly received online. 

    Michelle Wolf's best jokes and most biting barbs from the 2018 White House Correspondents' Association dinner

    Michelle Wolf's routine for the White House Correspondents' Association dinner on April at the Washington Hilton was raunchy and controversial at times.
    It including one joke about abortion that visibly unsettled the crowd, and uncomfortably personal attacks on White House staffers present .But she also drew laughs with her wide-ranging attacks on politicians and the media.
    Here are some of the highlights: 
    ON PRESIDENT DONALD TRUMP
    'Like a porn star says when she's about to have sex with a Trump, let's get it over with,' Wolf said to open the act. 'You know he's not any good.'
    'It's 2018 and I am a woman so you cannot shut me up. Unless you have Michael Cohen wire me $130,000,' said Wolf, referencing the Stormy Daniels controversy. 'You can find me on Venmo under my porn star name: Reince Priebus.'
    Wolf also addressed Trump's absence head on: 'I would drag him here myself, but it turns out that the president of the United States is the one p***y you're not allowed to grab.'
    On Trump pulling out of the Paris climate accord, she said: 'He said he was going to pull out and he did, and that's a refreshing quality in a guy.'  
    'You might be rich in Idaho but in New York you're just doing fine,' she said. 
    Using call and response from the audience, Wolf shouted 'Trump is so broke', to which the audience responded 'how broke is he?'
    Among her responses were: 'He has to fly failed business class'; 'He looked for foreign oil in Don Jr's hair'; 'Southwest used him as one of their engines'; and 'He had to borrow money from the Russians and now he's compromised.'
    'Trump is racist. He loves white nationalists, which is a funny term for a Nazi, it's like calling a pedophile a kid-friend or Harvey Weinstein a lady's man.' 
    And finally: 'He grabs p**sies because he thinks there might be loose change in them.'
    ON VICE PRESIDENT MIKE PENCE
    'Mike Pence is what happens when Anderson Cooper isn't gay. Mike Pence is the kind of guy who brushes his teeth and then drinks orange juice and thinks, Mmm,' said Wolf.
    'He thinks abortion is murder. Which first of all don't knock it til you try it. And when you do try it, really knock it, you gotta get that baby out of there.' 
    ON SARAH HUCKABEE SANDERS AND KELLYANNE CONWAY
    The room grew quiet and groans were heard as Wolf directed harsh jokes at White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders, who was sitting just feet away, including attacks on her appearance.
    'I have to say I'm a little starstruck, I loved you as Aunt Lydia in A Handmaid's Tale. Mike Pence, if you haven't seen it you would love it,' said Wolf, turning to Sanders.
    'Every time Sarah steps up to the podium, I get excited because I'm not really sure what we're gonna get. A press briefing, a bunch of lies, or divided into softball teams. [in deep voice] "It's shirts and skins and this time don't be such a little b***h Jim Acosta."'
    'I like Sarah, I think she's really resourceful. She burns facts and uses the ash to create a perfect smokey eye,' the comedian added. 'Maybe she's born with it, maybe it's lies. It's probably lies.'
    'I'm never really sure what to call Sarah Huckabee Sanders. Is it Sarah Sanders, is it Sarah Huckabee Sanders, is it Cousin Huckabee, is it Aunt Huckabee Sanders?' Wolf said, continuing, 'What's Uncle Tom but for white women who disappoint other white women? Ah I Know, Aunt Coulter.'
    Wolf also took shots at counselor to the president Kellyanne Conway. 'Man, she has the perfect name for what she does. Conway. It's like if my last name was tells-jokes-frizzy-hair-small-t*ts.'
    Ivanka Trump also came under fire: 'Ivanka, she was supposed to be an advocate for women but she is about as helpful to women as an empty box of tampons.' Wolf also compared the president's daughter to a 'diaper genie', saying she 'Looks sleek on the outside, but inside is full of s**t.'
    ON CONGRESS
    'I'm here to make jokes. I have no agenda, I'm not trying to get anything accomplished. So everyone who's here from Congress, we should get right get along.' 
    'Mitch McConnell isn't here tonight, he had a prior engagement. He's finally getting his neck circumcised.'
    'Paul Ryan couldn't make it, of course he's already been circumcised. Unfortunately while they were down there they also took his balls.'
    ON THE MEDIA 
    'I known there's a lot of people who want me to talk about Russia, and Putin, and collusion, but I'm not gonna do that because there's also a lot of liberal media here, and I've never really wanted to know what any of you look like when you orgasm. Except maybe for you, Jake Tapper. I bet it's something like this [blank face] "Ok, that's all the time we have."'
    'CNN, you guys love breaking news. And you did it, you broke it.'
    'Fox News is here so you know what that means, ladies: cover your drinks.'
    'We've got MSNBC here. MSNBC's new slogan is 'This Is Who We Are', guys that is not a good slogan.'
    'We cannot forget about Rachel Maddow, she's the Peter Pan of MSNBC. But instead of never growing up she never gets to the point. Watching Rachel Maddow is like going to Target. You went in for milk but you left with shampoo, candles and the entire history of the Byzantine Empire.' 
    'What would I do without Megyn Kelly? Probably be more proud of women.' 
    'I watch Morning Joe every morning. Now we know Mika and Joe are engaged, it's like when a MeToo works out.' 
    Omarosa, Spicer and other guests arrive at Correspondents' Dinner
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    The Washington dinner known as 'nerd prom', which once attracted Oscar winners and buzzed-about stars, comes as Trump routinely slams reporters as dishonest and their work as 'fake news'
    The Washington dinner known as 'nerd prom', which once attracted Oscar winners and buzzed-about stars, comes as Trump routinely slams reporters as dishonest and their work as 'fake news'
    A view of the crowd during the 2018 White House Correspondents' Dinner at the Washington Hilton on Saturday night
    A view of the crowd during the 2018 White House Correspondents' Dinner at the Washington Hilton on Saturday night
    Counselor to the President Kellyanne Conway

    Counselor to the President Kellyanne Conway (left) and White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders (right with husband Bryan) were among the current White House staffers in attendance - a major shift from last year when none 
    Sally Priebus (L) and former White House chief of staff Reince PriebusLisa Pevaroff-Cohn (L) and former White House chief economic advisor Gary Cohn
    Former White House chief of staff Reince Priebus (left) and Trump's former chief economic advisor Gary Cohn (right) both attended the White House Correspondents' dinner with their wives Sally and Lisa respectively
    Comedian Kathy Griffin attends the 2018 White House Correspondents' Dinner at the Washington HiltonComedian Kathy Griffin attends the 2018 White House Correspondents' Dinner at the Washington Hilton
    Comedian Kathy Griffin attends the 2018 White House Correspondents' Dinner at the Washington Hilton
    Anti-gun rights activist David Hogg (right) appeared on the red carpet with his companion Scion Kelly (left)
    Anti-gun rights activist David Hogg (right) appeared on the red carpet with his companion Scion Kelly (left)
    Stormy Daniels' lawyer Michael Avenatti (far right) photobombed Kellyane Conway and Sarah Huckabee Sanders on CNN
    Stormy Daniels' lawyer Michael Avenatti (far right) photobombed Kellyane Conway and Sarah Huckabee Sanders on CNN
    Stormy Daniels' lawyer Michael AvenattiCNN host Don Lemon (left) with his boyfriend Tim Malone
    Unlike last year's event, some of the top current White House staff were in attendance this year, signalling a possible thaw in Trump's often contentious relationship with the press. They included press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders and counselor to the president Kellyanne Conway.
    Ex-White House staffers were also in abundance at the event, including former Trump advisor Omarosa Manigault-Newman, ousted Chief Economic Advisor Gary Cohn, ex-chief of staff Reince Priebus and former White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer. 
    The DC journalism elite was also out in force, of course, including CNN personalities Jake Tapper and Don Lemon.
    Comedian Kathy Griffin, who created uproar last year by posing with a fake severed Trump head, also made an appearance on the red carpet, as did outspoken anti-gun activist David Hogg. 
    'The president encouraged his staff to attend and so we did, we felt like it was important,' said White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders in a red carpet interview with CNN. 'It's gonna be a great night both here and in Michigan.'
    As Sanders spoke next to Counselor to the President Kellyanne Conway, Stormy Daniels' lawyer Michael Avenatti photobombed the pair, lurking over Conway's shoulder with a grin.
    Moments later Avenatti spoke to the network, blasting Trump for failing to attend.
    'I think it's entirely disrespectful, I think it's disrespectful to the First Amendment,' said Avenatti, who is representing Daniels in her suit against Trump attempting to invalidate a hush agreement, in which the porn star says she was paid $130,000 to remain silent about a 2006 one-night-stand with Trump.
    'If you can't laugh at yourself, you have no business being in the position,' Avenatti said of Trump. 
    Reince Priebus speaks to CNNGary Cohn speaks to CNN
    Former White House chief of staff Reince Priebus (left) and former chief economic advisor Gary Cohn (right) were both in attendance and gave impromptu interviews to CNN, a frequent target of their former boss' 'fake news' accusations
    Reverend Al Sharpton poses with Virginia ex-Governor Terry McAuliffe and his wife Dorothy McAuliffe on the red carpet
    Reverend Al Sharpton poses with Virginia ex-Governor Terry McAuliffe and his wife Dorothy McAuliffe on the red carpet
    Jake TapperNews anchor Rita Cosby

    CNN host Jake Tapper and Inside Edition special correspondent Rita Cosby arrive at the dinner on Saturday night
    CNN legal analyst Laura CoatesCNN correspondent Jim Sciutto and wife Gloria Riviera of ABC

    CNN legal analyst Laura Coates (left) is seen, as is CNN correspondent Jim Sciutto and wife Gloria Riviera of ABC (right)
    Trump's former chief of staff Reince Priebus gave his own CNN interview on the red carpet, predicting the president might even attend next year's dinner.
    'I think there might be a little bit of a thaw occurring in the West Wing and maybe next year the President's going to be here,' said Priebus. 
    The Washington dinner known as 'nerd prom', which once attracted Oscar winners and buzzed-about stars, came as Trump routinely slams reporters as dishonest and their work as 'fake news.'  
    On Saturday night, Trump was in an entirely different Washington from the Correspondents' dinner - Washington Township, Michigan.
    Trump posted on Facebook this past week that he would hold a Saturday evening rally in Michigan with his 'favorite deplorables' - a term that Democrat Hillary Clinton used in 2016 to describe some of Trump's campaign supporters. 
    President Donald Trump boards Air Force One on Saturday night headed for a rally in Michigan. It is the second year in a row he has declined to attend the WHCA dinner
    President Donald Trump boards Air Force One on Saturday night headed for a rally in Michigan. It is the second year in a row he has declined to attend the WHCA dinner
    Trump speaks during a rally at Total Sports Park in Washington, Michigan on Saturday night, instead of attending the dinner
    Trump speaks during a rally at Total Sports Park in Washington, Michigan on Saturday night, instead of attending the dinner
    Trump's supporters packed into the arena in Washington Township - a far cry from the elite gathering in Washington DC
    Trump's supporters packed into the arena in Washington Township - a far cry from the elite gathering in Washington DC
    Trump attends rally instead of White House Correspondents' Dinner
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    Trump's aides skipped last year's dinner, when some accompanied Trump to a rally in Pennsylvania where he celebrated his 100th day in office. 
    This year, however, even with Trump out of town, many White House aides hobnobed with the journalists who cover them.
    In 2017, Trump became the first president to skip the event since Ronald Reagan in 1981; Reagan was recovering from an assassination attempt. 
    He spoke to a large crowd in Total Sports Park in a campaign style rally. 
    'Is this better than that phony White House Correspondents Dinner,' Trump asked the roaring crowed during his speech. 'I could be up there tonight smiling like I love when they're hitting you, shot after shot. These people, they hate your guts.

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